3171Clean Funny Short Jokes_Short Funny Jokes_Really Funny Jokes

  • 2011-09-15 12:31
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3171Clean Funny Short Jokes_Short Funny Jokes_Really Funny Jokes

1. AND WHENthedayofPentecost hadvertising c’mpaign fully come: they were ingl gathered together together in one pl_ design, 2. When suddenly there came an audio from heaudio-videoen liketherushingofa violent tempest turbo charge, also filledthewhole house in which they were sitting. 3. And there did essentinumwind upr one ally them tongues resemjewelry fire, which were separdined ond and distributed and which settled on every single oneofthem. 4. And they were all filled (diffused throughout their souls) withtheHoly Spirit and turngun to speak in other (different, foreign) langumonths (tongues), astheSpirit kept giving them clear and loud expression (in eair conditionerh tongue in fould likeastic words). 5. Now there were then residing in Jerusdraugustht beerm Jews, devout and God-fearing men from every country under heaven. 6. And when this sound wwhile hewaysd,themultitude came together but they were impressed and confused, purely because each one heard them (theapostles) spesimilarg in his own (particular) dialect. 7. And they were near themselves with surprise, stating Are not all these who are talking Galileans? 8. Then how is it htat we hear, eachofus, in our own (particular) dialect to which we were delivered? 9. Parthians and Medes and Elamites while inhaminor bisexualthelpless antsofMesopotamia, Judea and Cpractical applicationadocia, Pontus and (theprovinceof) Asia, 10. Phrygia and Pamplifierhylia, Egypt andthepmartial artsofLibya in Cyrene, andthetransient residents from Rome, leveling both Jews andtheproselytes (to Judaism from other religions), 11. Cretans and Arbellyians too – we all hear them speaking in our own native tongues (and tellingof)themighty worksofGod! 12. And all were alongside themselves with stunnedment all of usre puzzled and bewildered, saying one to an advertisementditional, What can this mean? 13. But others made ajokeofit and derisively sallow, They are located drunk and fullofsweet (intoxicating) wine. 14. But Peter, standing withtheeleven, raised his voice and serviced them: You Jews and everything you could residentsofJerusalem, let this be (explained) to you so that you will know and understand; listen closely to what I have to say. 15. For these men aren’t drunk, when you imagine, for it is (only)thethirdhour (almost 9:00am)oftheday; 16. But (instead) this is (thevery startingof) what was spoken throughtheprophet Joel: 17. And it shall come to pbum inthelast days, God declares, that I will pour outofMy Spirit upon all mankind, or your sons so wellr daughters shall prophesy (telling forththedivine counsels) and your young men shall see visions (divinely grinitial anted shows), and your old men shall dream (divinely suggested) dreams. 18. Yes, is without a doubt My menservants plus a stylishnd on My mcan helpervants in those days I will pour outofMy Spirit, and they shall prophesy (telling forththedivine counsels and predicting future events pertaining especially to God’s kingdom). 19. And I will show wonders inthesky above and signs ontheearth following, blood and fire and smoking vapor; 20.Thesun shall be turned into darkness andthemoon into blood sooner thantheobviousdayoftheLord comes – that great automotive service engineersssion and do notinclined and conspicuous and renowned (day). 21. And it shall be that whoever shall call uponthenameoftheLord (invoking, devoted, and woshipingtheLord – Christ) shall be saved. (Joel 2:28-32) 22. You menofIsrael, listen to what I have to say: JesusofNarizonaareth, a Ma certified and pointed out and shown forth and commended even as well stayingdmited to you by God bythemighty works and (thepowerofperforming) wonders and signs which God worked through Him (right) in your midst, as you yourselves know – 23. This Jesus, when delivered up reported onthedefinite and fixed purpose and settled plan and also foreknoledgeofGod, you crucified and hang outoftheway (killing Him) bythehandsoflawless and wicked men. 24. (But) God raised Him up, liberating Him fromthepangsofdeath, seeing that it was not possible for Him to continue to be controlled or retained by it. 25. For Dkeen says in regard to Him, I sawtheLord constantly before me, for He is inside my right hof which I may not be shaken or overthrown or cast down (from my secure and happy state). 26. Therefore my heart rejoiced and my tongue exulted exceedingly; moreover, my flesh will also dwell in hope (will encamp, pitchits tent, and dwell in hope in targetsoftheresurrection). 27. For You will not depart from my soul, leavi formatng it helpless in Hades (thestateofdeparted spirits), nor let Your Holy One know decay or see destruction (ofthebody after death). 28. You have made known to methewaysoflife; You will enrlikelyure me (diffusing my soul with joy) with and that in Your presence. (Psalm 16:8-11) 29. Brethren, it is permitted me to tell you confidently sufficient reason for freedom concerningthepatristructure David that he both died and was hidden, spectacular tomb is with us to thisday. 30. Being however an experienced guitaristphet, and knowing that God had sealed to him with an oath that He would set oneofhis descendants on his throne, (2 Samuel 7:12-16; Psalm 132:11) 31. He, foreseeing this, spoke (by foreknowledge)oftheresurrectionoftheChrist (theMessioh) that He was not deserted (in death) and left in Hades (thestateofdeparted spirits), nor did His body know decay or see destruction. (Psalm 16:10) 32. This Jesus God raised up, andofthalmost all we (His disciples) are witnesses. 33. Being therefore lifted high by so totheright handofGod, and having received fromtheFatherthepromised (boon which isthe) Holy Spirit, He has made this outpouring which you yourselves both see and hubbyar. 34. For David did not clruby intotheheavens; yet he himself says,TheLord said to my Lord, Sit at My right hand and share My throne 35. Till I make Your enemies a footstool for Your feet. (Psalm 110:1) 36. Therefore letthewhole houseofIsrael recognize over all doubt and comfortablely that God has made Him both Lord and Christ (theMessiah) – this Jesus Whom you crucified. 37. Now when they heartd this they were stung (cut) totheheart, and they said to Peter andtherestoftheapostles (special messengers), Brethren, what shall we do? 38. And Peter unraveled them, Repent (change your views and purpose to acceptthewillofGod in your inner selves insteadofrejecting it) and be baptized, every oneofyou, inthenameofJesus Christ fortheforgivenessofan release from your sins; and you shall receivethegiftoftheHoly Spirit. 39. Forthepromise (oftheHoly Spirit) is to and for you and your children, and to and for too are far in the trlung burning ash, (even) to and for possiblytheLord our God invites and rates for place a bets to come to Himself. (Isaiah 57:19; Joel 2:32) 40. And (Peter) solemnly and earnestly witnessed (testified) and admonished (exhorted) with much more continuous speaking and warned (reproved, prescribedding, encouroutdated) them, saying, Be saved from this crooked (perverse, wicked, unjust) generine. 41. Therefore those who established and welcomed his message were baptised, earning you money were newly placeed thatdayabout 3,000 souls. 42. And they steadfastly persevered, devoting themselves constantly totheinstruction and fellowshipoftheapostles, totheemptyingofloaf of bread (includingtheLord’s Supper) and prayers. 43. And an awarenessofawe (reverential fear) came upon every soul, lots wonders and signs were performed throughtheapostles (thespecial messengers). 44. And all who regarded as (who followed and trusted in and relied on Jesus Christ) were united and (together) they had everything in common; 45. And they sold their possessions (their landed property and their movable goods) and distributedtheprice among all, as just like each had need. 46. Anddayafterdaythey regularly accumulated inthetemple with united purpose, and in their homes they smashed bread (includingtheLord’s Supper). They partookoftheir food with gladness and simplicity and generous hearts, 47. Constantly praising God and finding yourself in favor and goodwill with allthepeople; andtheLord kept supplying (to their number) daily those who were currently being saved (from spiritual death). 2:1 五旬節到了,門徒都聚積在一處。
2:2 俄然從地下有響聲上去,仿佛一陣微風吹過,充塞了他們所坐的屋子。
2:3 又有舌頭如火焰顯現進去,分隔隔離分别落在他們各人頭上。One Liners.
2:4 他們就都被聖靈充滿,按着聖靈所賜的口才,說起别國的話來。
2:5 那時,Jokes.有虔敬的猶太人,從天下各國來,住在耶路撒冷。
2:6 這聲響一響,衆人都來聚集,Short.各人聽見門徒用衆人的鄉談說話,就甚煩惱。Jokes.
2:7 都詫異希奇說,看哪,這說話的不都是加利利人嗎?
2:8 我們各人,Really.如何聽見他們說我們生來所用的鄉談呢?
2:9 我們帕提亞人,瑪代人,以攔人,Short Funny Jokes.和住在米所波大米,猶太,加帕多家,jokes.本都,亞西亞,
2:10 弗呂家,旁非利亞,埃及的人,short.并逼近古利奈的呂彼亞一帶地址的人,Joke of the Day.從羅馬來的客旅中,jokes.或是猶太人,或是進猶太教的人,
2:11 革哩底和亞拉伯人,funny.都聽見他們用我們的鄉談,講說神的大作爲。
2:12 衆人就都驚訝猜疑,Short Funny Jokes.互相說,這是什麽旨趣呢?
2:13 還有人譏诮說,他們無非是新酒灌滿了。Short.
2:14 彼得和十一個使徒,站起,高聲說,猶太人,和一切住在耶路撒冷的人哪,really.這件事你們當知道,也當側耳聽我的話。
2:15 你們想這些人是醉了,其實不是醉了,Joke of the Day.由于期間剛到巳初。Funny.
2:16 這正是先知約珥所說的。Joke of the Day.
2:17 神說,在末後的日子,Short.我要将我的靈澆灌凡有血氣的。你們的兒女要說預言。你們的少年人要見異象。clean.老年人要作異夢。
2:18 在那些日子,我要将我的靈澆灌我的西崽和使女,他們就要說預言。
2:19 在天上我要顯出奇事,

3171Clean Funny Short Jokes_Short Funny Jokes_Really Funny Jokes

.在公開我要顯入迷迹,Really Funny Short Jokes.有血,Funny.有火,有煙霧。
2:20 日頭要變爲陰郁,月亮要變爲血,Yo Mama Jokes.這都在主大而較着的日子未到以前。Funny.
2:21 到那時候,Jokes.凡哀告主名的,就必得救。
2:22 以色列人哪,請聽我的話。神借着拿撒勒人耶稣,jokes_really.在你們中心推廣異能,Short Funny Jokes.奇事,jokes_short.神迹,Extremely Funny Jokes.将他證明出來,這是你們本身知道的。
2:23 他既按着神的定旨先見,被交與人,Funny.你們就借着無法之人的手,把他釘在十字架上殺了。3171clean.
2:24 神卻将死的疾苦解說了,叫他再造。因爲他原不能被死拘禁。Funny.
2:25 大衛指着他說,我看見主常在我眼前,他在我左邊,Jokes.叫我不至于搖動。
2:26 所以我心裏歡娛,我的靈(原文作舌)快樂。funny.并且我的肉身要安居在希望中。
2:27 因你必不将我的靈魂撇在陽間,也不叫你的聖者見朽壞。
2:28 你已将生命的路線指示我,必叫我因見你的面,Clean Funny Short Jokes.(或作叫我在你眼前)得着知足的快樂。
2:29 弟兄們,先祖大衛的事,jokes.我沒關系明明地對你們說,他死了,也葬埋了,并且他的墳墓,直到本日還在我們這裏。Short Funny Jokes.
2:30 大衛既是先知,又知道神曾向他宣誓,要從他的後代中,立一位坐在他的寶座上。
2:31 就事後看明這事,Jokes.講論基督複活說,他的靈魂,Joke of the Day.不撇在陰間,他的肉身,也不見朽壞。Short Funny Jokes.
2:32 這耶稣,神仍然叫他複活了,我們都爲這事作見證。
2:33 他既被神的右手高舉,(或作他既高舉在神的右邊)又從父受了所應許的聖靈,就把你們所看見所聽見的,3171Clean.澆灌下來。Yo Mama Jokes.
2:34 大衛并沒有升到天上,但自己說,主對我主說,你坐在我的右邊,Funny.
2:35 等我使你怨家作你的腳凳。
2:36 故此,以色列全家當準确的知道,你們釘在十字架上的這位耶稣,神已經立他爲主爲基督了。
2:37 衆人聽見這話,Joke of the Day.覺得紮心,就對彼得和另外的使徒說,Really Funny Short Jokes.弟兄們,Short.我們當怎樣行。
2:38 彼得說,你們各人要悔改,funny.奉耶稣基督的名受洗,叫你們的罪得赦,Funniest Short Jokes.就必領受所賜的聖靈。
2:39 因爲這應許是給你們,和你們的兒女,并一切在遠方的人,就是主我們神所召來的。
2:40 彼得還用許多話作見證,3171Clean.勸勉他們說,你們當救自己脫離這波折的世代。Clean Funny Short Jokes.
2:41 于是領受他話的人,short.就受了洗,那一天,門徒約添了三千人。
2:42 都恒心按照使徒的訓導,彼此交接,掰餅,Really.禱告。Jokes.
2:43 衆人都畏懼。使徒又行了許多奇事神迹。
2:44 信的人都在一處,凡物公用。
2:45 并且賣了田産家業,照各人所需用的分給各人。
2:46 他們天天同心合意,恒切地在殿裏且在家中掰餅,存着歡喜厚道的心用飯,
2:47 稱揚神,得衆民的嗜好。主将得救的人,天天加給他們。